“So like are you really trans?”

This here is a PSA to inform all that asking transgender people inappropriate questions and claiming it’s to educate themselves is NOT cute. Who do you think you are, non-transgender person!? Why do some people think it’s okay ask people about their parts below the belt? Or pry into someone else’s sex life because they feel entitled to know how transgender people “work”? Please have a seat, Sir/Madam/Non-gender conforming individual. No, actually have several seats.

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Stuff like that really pisses me off. If someone walked up to a cisgendered person and asked them some of the insane questions transgender people get asked…Lord knows it wouldn’t be pretty. That person would be called a creep, pervert, pig, insensitive (and the list goes on). Not to mention if said person asked is a minor, the asker would most likely be called a pedo. Yes… transgender people who are minors get asked questions like these too *heavy sigh*.

I actually read about blogger, Noah Wolter, who wrote about their unwanted transgender Q&A.  Some of the questions they get asked include variations of: “Did you get THE surgery yet?”, “What’s your REAL name?”, “How do you have sex?” and the infamous, “What bathroom do you use?”.

RUDE. RUDE. RUDE. RUDE.

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In what world is asking questions like that, especially to complete strangers, acceptable? I know some may honestly be curious but there are a million other questions you can ask someone who is transgender that don’t involve a NSFW warning.

And what kind of question is, “What’s you REAL name?” anyway? What’s YOUR real name Bob? Hmmm hmmmm? Sure thing, Sam…if that’s your REAL name! Just call people what they tell you to call them. Making things complicated for no reason!

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Wolter also made a very valid point, suggesting or assuming that a trans person has had surgery is problematic. A transgender person does not need to have surgery in order to validate their gender change. Having surgery does not make one any more man or woman than they were before the surgical sex change. It can be a slap in the face for those who don’t desire a surgery to “finalize” their transition. Are they not good enough for cisgenders? Give them a break! It’s bad enough they are ridiculed for even being brave enough to come out as trans, now people are making them feel like they have to go under the knife in order to fit societal beauty standards?!

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Some might not have ill intentions when they ask these questions. People are people. And some people are nosy as hell and don’t think before they start running their mouths. Use your noggins, folks.

Jeez, for a group of people that get offended when you ask them a question about income and salary…folks sure know how to ask a lot of personal questions. Transgender people are PEOPLE with emotions and freakin’ personal lives. They aren’t immune to embarrassment or anger when you bombard them with questions or staring (like people who stare are so rude OMG). They deserve respect. If you respect them, you need to respect their privacy. With that being said, if you think your question sounds distasteful or offensive, it probably is. Hey, when in doubt, shut your mouth…just might keep ya outta trouble!

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Watch and Learn

Thought I’d share with you some of the YouTubers I watch who also happen to be transgender and active members in the LGBT community. I’ve also linked their channels if ya wanna watch ’em slayyyyyyy! 🙂

Gigi Gorgeous

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Princess Joules

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Nikita Dragun

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(Even though Nikita has been linked to problematic Jeffree Star I still included her)

Transgender Suicide Awareness

Maybe I picked today’s topic to be about suicide because I’ve been watching the Netflix series, “13 Reasons Why” which is about a girl who kills herself, and I wanted to add to the feeling of how important an issue this is. In general, no one should ever feel like they no longer belong in this world. Everyone in this world is given life for a purpose and they need to know that. Whether that is to love, grow, or experience new things. When it comes to the struggles being faced today they also need to know they’re not alone in this world because others may be going through the same things. It’s not worth risking their lives over.

This issue is usually one that people rather not touch. I completely understand as it’s a heartbreaking and painful subject. Even the transgender community are often afraid to speak of it because sadly transgender individuals are at a higher risk of suicide. According to this Huffington Post article: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/brynn-tannehill/the-truth-about-transgend_b_8564834.html, 40% of transgender individuals have attempted suicide. This is something that needs immediate attention and we can’t just ignore it. All these individuals want is to be accepted by society for who they are and if they’re not getting that it can drive them over the edge where they might end up doing something drastic like suicide. This is why we need to be there for them more then ever.

The media is trying to promote helping them today with hotlines to call for help and having celebrity advocates. Caitlyn Jenner, who in 2015 made her transition as a transgender women right before our eyes, is an advocate for preventing teen transgender suicide. The more people that can advocate for this the more we can bring awareness on this issue and help transgender individuals never feel rejected in society.

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*New Movie Alert*

 

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The film 3 Generations stars Elle Fanning as a female to male transgender teen named Ray. Apparently the film premiered two years ago and pissed people off because Fanning isn’t transgender. I understand why the LGBT community and upset, why not cast a trans kid for a movie about trans people DUH. The film’s director, Gaby Dellal, explains she would definitely cast a trans kid “But finding a kid that hadn’t medically transitioned or hormonally transitioned yet and was in exactly the same time frame as the character of Ray is incredibly hard to find” (VanityFair.com). I understand casting a transgender person for a film like this is much easier said than done. I respect Dellal for not only making this film but for showing compassion and understanding for the LGBT community. The movie is being released in theaters on May 5th!!!! Yay!

(P.S. If you haven’t seen The Danish Girl yet….DO IT….. JUST DO IT!!!)maxresdefault.jpg

 

Mind your own ____.

Okay so I was going to post discussing a different topic at first but when I saw this article I couldn’t pass it up. Have you ever seen something so ridiculous you’re at a loss for words? Well brace yourself, folks. A restaurant in Oklahoma City, which is said to be quite popular (not sure how when it makes customers feel this unwelcomed) has issued a warning to it’s transgender customers. Unlike the Steak and Catfish Barn in Oklahoma City, I’m genuinely warning you: Watch your back when dining at this restaurant. The restaurant owner, Bob Warner allowed a sign to be displayed in his business’ window which threatened transgender customers (see below):

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Hmm..even though Warner claims he’s just looking out for his business and the well being of others, it sounds a bit like… a threat. (Hey, I just call ‘em as I see ‘em.) Warner said according to The Blaze, “We have a lot of redneck guys that come in here…If their wife or their little girl walked in that bathroom and a man followed them in there, I wouldn’t have a restaurant.” Wow… let’s give it up for this guy! What a hero! So selfless!

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Is this guy serious? That’s his best excuse? Hey buddy, if you’re so concerned why not make a gender neutral bathroom?! Or as some may like to call it a FAMILY BATHROOM. *oohhs and aahhs erupt from the crowd*

Warner argues that we should keep children and women safe by not allowing transgender customers to use the bathroom of the gender they IDENTIFY with. He adds that they can use the bathroom if they “dress appropriately”. And no he doesn’t elaborate. Umm excuse me…what does that even mean?! Are sweatpants allowed or is that too casual?

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It’s people like Warner who claim to not be transphobic or homophobic that are stopping us from progressing. They’re stereotypical and prejudice and pretend they’re doing it all for the common good. He’s essentially making an accusation that transgender individuals are predators. There have been studies that show transgender individuals are more likely to encounter problems when using a public restroom. A report at UCLA said close to 70% of transgender people experienced verbal harassment and near 10% experienced physical assault when using public restroom (Time.com). When was the last time you were attacked in a bathroom, Warner? Why force someone who identifies as a woman or man to go into the other gender’s bathroom where they can potentially be assaulted? He doesn’t seem THAT concerned about the wellbeing of his customers now, does he?

Also can someone please break the news to him…if someone wants to peep on people in the restroom they’re probably already doing it. Some freaky guy down the street can dress up as a woman and creep into the ladies’ room with or without transgender people being allowed in it. So Warner, you ain’t helping…SO STOP.

I don’t know about you guys but I have no problem using the bathroom with someone who is transgender. I’m not worried about being assaulted by a transgender person in the restroom either. Transgender people want to do their business and get the hell out just like you and I; because let’s face it those public restrooms are NAAAASSSSTTTYYYYY.

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This is about much more than the bathroom, it’s about safety, dignity, respect and equality. How can you expect someone to go to your business when you can’t even let them do theirs without threatening them? You can’t preach to be helping the common good and then blatantly discriminate.

Until next time friends…and remember do your business and stay out of other people’s. 😉

 

Food For Thought: Transgender Bathroom User

A transgender women named Kat Blaque, a YouTube personality and transgender rights activist, gives a food for thought in this video where she talks about how transgender people are not looking to assault or harass people in the bathroom, they are looking to use the bathroom just to use the bathroom like any other human being. The bathroom bill is not going to do anything to prevent assaults from happening. Issues with the bathroom bill and assault are what transgender individuals are facing today and to be more aware I highly recommend watching this video down below!